“This is life in Washington, DC: Moo! I am a cow!” “What?” “Moo! Cows live in DC!” My old college buddy James was on the floor, under the table, screaming over the oppressive jukebox and pounding the underside of the table with his fist. I’d long since taken my beer and cradled it to my […]
I’ve managed to avoid three Obama “victory parties” so far. The only thing that scares me more than the Nazis who follow McCain are the wild-eyed armchair liberals who rally around Obama’s “message” of hope and change. Which is how Hitler ran his first campaign, by the way.
I sometimes tell people I’m a political junkie. But I think I might be lying because, really, politics bores me.
On one hand, I’m thrilled that more people are using public transportation. Not because I’m a supporter of the environment. I’m very much the opposite, in fact. I support a ruined Earth and a dying civilization, simply because I think it’ll be mildly entertaining and break up the tedium of my life. I’m thrilled because […]
Oh-ho! No Boble today, because I’ve spent the last week and a half being sick and pathetic. So, instead, we’ll talk about why Scipio was a lousy general.
So… Is Chelsea Clinton really a Jack Nicholson-style Joker? I finally spent a few seconds paying attention to shit last night, as Hillary endorsed America’s Favorite Black Man, and it struck me that something was up. Chelsea’s always going around with that frozen, empty smile that looks more painful than anything else. She’s clearly had […]
Every so often, the right combination of factors (a woman, boredom, stolen computer equipment) come together where I seriously consider starting a porno site. The Nacho Sasha Porn Site Idea has gone through many phases. The first, of course, was “filthywomenathome.com.”
Like any good American, I’m following the presidential primaries the same way a person pays attention to a bottle rolling down the aisle of the subway car. You know: Please don’t hit my feet and force me to take some sort of ownership. Because when you go to kick it away, everyone looks at you […]
Kucinich is out of the race. I was never a supporter, but I will miss his wife. I think every presidential candidate needs an Amazonian redhead lurking around in the shadows. Which leads to a joke about Hillary’s wife, I’m sure, but I’m here at work in the AM locked in combat with a sinus […]