Category: Rants


I have a recurring nightmare that does not involve getting a colonoscopy.  If it did, it would make much more sense.  Instead, my nightmare is a very basic, very unsurprising anxiety dream.  So mundane, in fact, that I hesitate to call it a nightmare.  It doesn’t wake me up, it doesn’t leave me unsettled.  It’s […]

Passive Pursuit

Things I’m interested in but don’t actively pursue: (1) Learning a language (2) Exercise (3) Exploring my home town (4) Women (5) Happiness (6) Stabbing certain people I know in the neck This month is all about my resolutions for 2008, one of which is to get fat and never leave the apartment and die […]


Much to my shame, I spent an enormous amount of money putting my way through college so I could earn a BA in history, which will get me about as far as just leaving all my application forms blank when I apply for a job. Looking back, though, I don’t really have any regrets. It […]

The Hero Falls

I spent a good portion of last night thinking about old British shows where the main character dies early on. Well, actually, I spent much of the night drinking scotch and trying to make my living room as dark as possible. At about 1am, I ended up hammering blankets over all the windows and, thankfully, […]


In an attempt to fill the dead time between, you know, 9:30am and 6pm, I was reading deep into the news because, once you get past Obama, Iran, and whatever else has hit the fan, you can really ferret out some good shit. Man dies trying to save 1999 Dodge pickup, for example. Or the […]


Two weeks away and now I’m back at work. Clocked in at 9:30am, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Deleted everything in my inbox because anyone who emailed me while I was on vacation is a fucking asshole and not deserving of my attention. Dumped my physical inbox into the trashcan – same reason. Swept a bunch of […]

Holiday Resolutions

Back from two weeks in the UK – Christmas with a group of old friends, together for the first time in about a decade. All grown up and married with kids, so I was the weird bachelor who drunkenly played with the infant. I found myself, especially on New Years Eve, to be on the […]

Radiate & Fade Away

The current anti-smoking ad campaign on the Metro not only says second hand smoke causes SIDS, it also notes that cigarette smoke “contains radioactive materials – cancer causing materials that are also found in nuclear bombs.” Holy shit! That changes my entire world perspective. Not only is the sky falling, but cigarettes are packed full […]