I spent much of last night (as one does) thinking about Romancing the Stone, the charming little Kathleen Turner-Michael Douglas action vehicle from 1984. As a kid, I loved the movie, and I still think it holds up surprisingly well. Maybe it was that early love affair with Kathleen Turner’s sideboob that puts this film […]
Man, I blame so many people for all the bad shit that’s happened to me. The evil of my parents, the ingratitude and downright vicious usury of my idiot friends in high school, ex-lovers who are fucking retards for leaving me, and whoever was responsible for Galactica: 1980. Seriously, though. Sure, family, friends, and lovers […]
I wasn’t big into comics when I was a kid. I feel like I missed some sort of fundamental childhood stage because of that and, now, am far behind all my friends, culturally speaking.
I think Black Rock is the worst revenge flick ever made in that you’re asked to identify with the rapists and feel bad for them. I honestly cannot tell if the movie has cast the trio of tortured women as the villains or not. I’m so shocked by the pro-violent rape message, that I have […]
I’m sure I’m not the first to point out that only unlikable characters die in the first Die Hard movie, and this is a sharp contrast to all the others. Even the uber-safecracker Theo, the only likable terrorist, survives Die Hard 1. It’s also notable that Theo doesn’t actually kill anyone, which might be a […]
This weekend, I tried to make a list of ill-conceived sequels that ruined the original movies, but found it hard going. There are so many obvious examples that leap to mind, but most of them can be dismissed, forgiven, or explained away. This left me without an article and once again back to the blank […]
Where was I? Oh, yes. Space: 2099.
Nine years ago, I wrote an article titled Cheeta Lives which, as I review it today, appears to have been written under the influence of Sudafed and illegally imported bathtub gin. At the time, Cheeta was 71 years old and living the high life in a retirement home, fawned after by nurses and addicted to […]
Here’s something you can file under “what was lost” and has not yet been found: The two great 80’s Soviet invasion TV miniseries. On the big screen, in the 80’s, we had Patrick Swayze fighting Cuban paratroopers, the ultimate in jingoism in Reagan’s new America. But it’s what was playing out on the small screen […]
by Lonnie Martin (AKA Rotting Corpse) Dear Fox Television, Look, I’m not going to Monday morning quarterback how you screwed up Terra Nova. I won’t mention how you thought you had a sure thing (which, by the way, you should have had), spent way too much money on it, then got scared and let too […]