Black Rock’s black marks

I think Black Rock is the worst revenge flick ever made in that you’re asked to identify with the rapists and feel bad for them. I honestly cannot tell if the movie has cast the trio of tortured women as the villains or not. I’m so shocked by the pro-violent rape message, that I have to review it here.

Let’s break it down. Lake Bell, the wife from The League, Katie Aselton (also directing and writing), and some blonde chick are a trio of friends reuniting after 15 or 20 years. They decide to go to some sort of Bridge to Terebithia island near their old home town where they buried a time capsule, tra-la-la. There’s tension. We get this explained to us in an over-the-top scene that makes no sense. Lake Bell fucked Katie Aselton’s husband and kinda sorta maybe ruined her life, even though it’s somewhat clear that Katie Aselton is really the one who mismanaged the last 15 years of her life. But, hey, the gals air their grievances, and the goodnik blonde chick helps them see eye to eye.

As they are seeing eye to eye, they are surprised by a trio of young men. Our gals have assumed that the island is empty of life, and the purpose of this trip is to reignite their childhood sisterhood. Or something. So, wow, three guys! One is the cute younger brother of a guy they went to high school with, one is a quiet black guy, one is a stringy sociopath. Katie Aselton (who spends most of the first 30 minutes drunk and horny) invites the guys into their camp. They’re failing at hunting deer, she says they have food and Jim Beam, amen.

All seems fine… So Katie Aselton starts to throw herself at the young cute guy. She’s pawing at him and talking sex talk and all this. He fends her off, ignores her, and acknowledges that she’s drunk. He’s a good guy. He keeps putting her back in her place till she drunkenly gives up and goes off into the night in search of firewood. Our guy stays put and socializes with the other two girls. All three of the guys seem like great people.

During the innocent conversation, Katie Aselton, drunkenly stumbling through the woods, starts to lasciviously tempt our guy. He watches out of the corner of his eye as she walks the ridge, occasionally turning her flashlight on herself and beckoning him to join her. Her two friends have previously called her out and told her to lay off this behavior, and she has confessed that her marriage is over and she wants to get laid.

This goes on for about three painfully directed minutes until our guy gives up and says he’s going for a piss. So he goes out and rendezvouses with Katie Aselton. She throws herself at him. Kissing and pawing and saying what I feel are insanely sexual things. He responds by grabbing her tits. She says no. So, then, he becomes the classic rapist and throws her to the ground. She kills him with a rock tout de suite.

His two friends — whom he has saved multiple times in insanely heroic circumstances in Iraq and Afghanistan — don’t take kindly to this.

Note: No rape has occurred. It doesn’t at any point in the film. This is a revenge flick where the women are seeking revenge when there has been no crime perpetrated on them.

The two survivors tie up the three women after a few hard punches are thrown and discuss their options. The women escape and go out for revenge. For… I’m not sure what. Revenge involves them preying upon the wounded black guy and shooting him in the face, point-blank, while he is crippled and fighting for survival. Then, for the last man standing, the girls quite simply slaughter him.

Yes, he shoots the goodnik blonde chick in the head. But you’re almost cheering for him at that point. Even then, you’re confused about who you’re supposed to identify with. Is the skinny sociopath the “last girl” trope from the horror genre? Is he going to defeat this trio of bloodthirsty women?

No. The two gals kill him brutally and uncomfortably, and they are given the “last girl” trope finale.

So what are we supposed to take away from this movie? The only lessons I can see are: (1) Women are evil. (2) Women will tempt you into sin. (3) If you become angry because women murdered your friend/hero/savior, you are bad. (4) If you seek revenge for such a murder, women will kill you with sharpened bamboo stakes after gratuitous scenes of nudity. (5) The cops will believe them because they’re women and you are disgraced hero soldiers.

Nacho’s rating: Avoid at all costs. And shame on you, Katie Aselton.