Beautiful Things
Since I now only write articles so that I can keep the GS Kindle subscription active and, therefore, make my precious $3 a month from subscribers who mistakenly think this is a porn site for some reason, I should probably …
Category: Rants
Let them eat static
I often go on about how bored I am. And I am. It’s overwhelming, sometimes. Every single aspect of my life is predictable. Like a show you’ve watched a million times. My entire life is Star Trek II on mute …
That Place on My Lip That I Keep Biting
I have crooked teeth. People like to point this out all the time in what, I presume, is an attempt to destroy me and make me finally commit to a path of ultimate evil. I suppose, if I had a …
Ass
I’ve come to appreciate girl’s butts.
The Pattern
One of the things I struggle with is why I so often go girl crazy. I don’t enjoy relationships, I don’t enjoy sex, I want nothing but to be left alone, and, yet, time and time again, I’ll fall instantly …
38
If you’re reading this, then that means [I’ve initiated a highly volatile hostage situation/survived Easter]. Now that the last family-oriented holiday has passed, we enter six blissful months where I don’t have to think about being a functional human being …
Easter
In Sunday school, of course, Easter was always a hot topic. Something about a bunch of guys having an orgy in a room who are accidentally drugged and have a collective hallucination that acts as Event One for 2000 years …
Reunion
Like most normal, sane people, I had put high school behind me. The worst years of our lives, really, no matter how much you try to sugarcoat it. When the 20th reunion party planners contacted me, I was a little …
Winter Break
I’ll be out of town for a little over two weeks, so I figured that’s a good time for the front page to take a break as well. If you’re bored over the holidays, you can go back and read …
Holiday Interlude
I figured I’d cheat on this article and break from the Vignettes Project. I figure all you folks are in post-family mode. Happy and safe and holiday-drunk, right? And it’s “Black Friday,” which means I should post a link to …