Autobiography
Top ten things I wish I had included in the stupid memoir about my evil family and my fucked up life after I had them all killed:
Top ten things I wish I had included in the stupid memoir about my evil family and my fucked up life after I had them all killed:
There’s been no escaping the post-election freakout. I’ve tried. But everyone’s talking about it…seemingly more than usual. The four stages of jilted liberal grief are just so predictable though.
First of all, I’m addicted to voting. I think it’s important, I always vote, and I revel in the idea that my little vote is part of a grander, greater voice of potential revolution. At the local level, I vote against judges and council people I don’t fucking know out of pure spite. I write […]
Since I discovered ‘The Most Dangerous Writing App Ever’* which isn’t an app but a webpage I have been holding myself to a once-per-week exercise of writing non-stop for five minutes. http://www.themostdangerouswritingapp.com/ *Note, if you stop writing for more than a few seconds you lose all progress Here is entry #1 unedited and purposefully bombastic. […]
The first time I got a job where I didn’t have to punch a fucking clock, I decided to stop observing Daylight Savings Time. This is harder than it seems, and not for the reason you think. I had to disable the option on half the clocks in the house, and I ended up using […]
When I was a kid, I always wanted a barometer. They just seemed so romantic and exciting, you know? It was this antique looking brass dial that sea captain’s had, and all of the old people I knew who were halfway cool had a barometer in their house. People talked about the barometer all the […]
What’s wrong you idiots? Trump is the best possible thing that could happen to this country. We need him in the White House! Think about it – everyone in Congress will unite against him. His mere presence will dissolve the two party system and we’ll move into an era of egalitarian utopia as congressmen, senators, […]
I’m bored and all the news is about Trump, so I’m going to write a long post about something that doesn’t matter to anyone. But I think it’s funny!
I have only one wish for the human race in 2016. And that wish is…
I didn’t have a post ready today because I’ve been doing all this for-money writing all week and I can’t concentrate on anything. Also, the only thing that I feel compelled to do is post tons of Youtube clips of Bowie singing and Rickman doing a terrible American accent that doesn’t even fool John McClane. […]