When thinking of this article during my morning commute, that\u2019s the title that was sort of stuck with it.<\/p>\n
I cook up most of these posts during my long bus and train ride into the office, because I find it much easier to press my forehead against the window and daydream instead of read, or scribble in the little notebook that I carry around with me like Super Nerd. <\/span><\/p>\n It\u2019s easier, in part, because I\u2019m always somewhat fuzzy until about 10am. <\/span>I was never a morning person, though I wake up at 5:30am because I resent not having enough time to sit around and bitch about having to go to work. <\/span><\/p>\n The larger reason why I\u2019ve turned to daydreaming during my commute is because everyone else is bored to tears and, the moment you whip out a book or start writing, the person next to you is going to become intimately involved. <\/span>There have been times I\u2019ll look up from my notepad, see the person staring at me wide eyed, and been asked what\u2019s next.<\/p>\n Well, sir, go to Greatsociety.org, because I\u2019m posting again after a two year semi-hiatus. <\/span>And all my posts are gripping and exciting. <\/span>And, after a few paragraphs, when the idiot bosses who plague my readers give up reading, I talk about horrible things. <\/span>Sometimes I even post huge pictures of cartoon genitalia. <\/span>Oh, and, why the fuck are you all up in my business you motherfucking pervert? <\/span>I\u2019ll give you a ten minute head start and, then \u2013 Manhunt! <\/span>KAPOW KAPOW! <\/span>You\u2019ll take it bitch! <\/span>You\u2019ll be on the ground with a bullet in you and, then, maybe I can have this seat to myself and not have some nosy shitheel all up in my ass.<\/p>\n 7.5 wasn\u2019t about this. <\/span>It was about how a friend has recently informed me that all seven seasons of MacGyver<\/em> are currently available online at CBS.com. <\/span>My office conspires to block just about anything useful. <\/span>The latest incarnation of tv-links doesn\u2019t work, Netflix is crippled so I can\u2019t use their watch instantly section, and the computers are pieces of sad shit that have trouble playing the enormous amount of illegal downloads I steal every day.<\/p>\n But, for some reason, CBS.com works. <\/span>The \u201c7.5\u201d refers to how long I work each day. <\/span>My office is \u201cEuropean\u201d and \u201cliberal\u201d so they \u201caward us\u201d with a 7.5 hour day. <\/span>Which is really 8.5 hours, because they don\u2019t pay for lunch. <\/span>Actually, it\u2019s really 11 hours, thanks to the commute.<\/p>\n So everything\u2019s a lie.<\/p>\n On average (and even if it\u2019s ignoring my duties), I try to put in 45 minutes of work a day. <\/span>Oddly, I do that work during lunch, because it\u2019s usually a last minute panic to get it done. <\/span>I regard the 7.5 <\/span>hours as my time. <\/span>Working, unless at a real job, is against everything moral and just. <\/span>So I\u2019m going to cash their checks, stay in this windowless office, and do nothing. Call it a protest. <\/span>But how to kill seven hours when the internet is hobbled? <\/span>Luckily I have what representatives at the Washington Post<\/em> call a \u201chobby.\u201d <\/span>I\u2019m running a publishing company, and our third book is getting some great buzz. <\/span>So I\u2019m doing stuff for that book from when I wake up at 5:30 to when I pass out around 10pm. <\/span>But there\u2019s an awful lot of downtime waiting for replies or events or whatnot, so I\u2019m still left with dead air during the day. <\/span><\/p>\n Most of my co-workers bring in laptops and watch movies. <\/span>They\u2019re very good at hiding this, somehow. <\/span>I have a harder time, because my bosses either (a) expect more from me or (b) hate me. <\/span>Their frequent visits to my office make movie watching difficult. <\/span><\/p>\n Then my friend sent me to CBS\u2026and it worked! <\/span>So I\u2019m on episode six of season one of MacGyver<\/em>, with a million more episodes to go. <\/span>Though the show really started to suck in the fourth season when the format switched from secret agent MacGyver<\/em> to hangs out with little boys and recycles MacGyver<\/em>.<\/p>\n Still, though, it\u2019s a thrill to get paid to watch MacGyver<\/em>. <\/span>And it\u2019s in a little window on my second screen, turned from the door, so I can sit with correct posture and have all kinds of work stuff up on my first screen and be all working and stuff and things.<\/p>\n Strangely, I\u2019ve found myself working more throughout the day. <\/span>Episode of MacGyver<\/em> rolling on screen two while I sort of half watch it and automatically do all the stupid shit I\u2019m required to do. <\/span>Then, when the credits roll (or I pause to watch something blow up), I\u2019m a little shocked at how much I was getting done while on auto pilot.<\/span><\/p>\n Back to title troubles. <\/span>When I typed out the \u201c7.5\u201d title, with the intent of talking about MacGyver<\/em> and my office habits, it hit me that I had come on a title for a not-so-cataclysmic disaster movie. <\/span>Earthquake: 7.5!<\/em> Oh, yeah. <\/span>The statue of Jefferson Davis fell over! <\/span>Cliffhanger ending!<\/p>\n I could make a whole string of those films. <\/span>Cold Front! <\/span>Traffic Jam! <\/span>Winds Gusting to 30 MPH!<\/em> <\/em> <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" When thinking of this article during my morning commute, that\u2019s the title that was sort of stuck with it. I cook up most of these posts during my long bus and train ride into the office, because I find it …<\/p>\n