Literary Whores<\/a>,
\nI discussed the definition of a bestselling book in terms of number of
\ncopies sold. Think about the deeper horror that lies under those
\nunmasked sales figures. If a bestseller equals 20,000 copies sold, and
\na healthy percentage of those copies are sitting on a shelf or in a
\nwarehouse somewhere, what’s that say about our culture? If big man
\nStephen King can only expect 50,000 copies of his work to sell, and if
\neven J.K. Rowling, who is reprinted in almost every nation on Earth,
\nand in a few dead languages, can only expect to sell a few hundred
\nthousand copies, what’s that telling us? 20,000 out of hundreds of
\nmillions? 500,000 out of billions?<\/p>\nReading a book is a commitment. I had an argument with one of my
\nsources about this, and she said that the literary profession is highly
\ncompetitive – new books coming out all the time, tens of thousands of
\nbooks in print, no wonder only a few thousand of each sell, so maybe
\nI’m setting my standards too high in thinking that the world’s leading
\nnation should be reading more. Either way, the competition argument
\ndoesn’t hold water for me. There are hundreds of TV channels, all of
\nthem with programs running 24\/7, and the benchmark of success is
\nmeasured in millions of viewers. If there can be numbers in the
\nmillions for each one of an incalculable amount of programs running on
\nseveral different mediums, and still enough room to expect in excess of
\n$10 billion in video and DVD sales per year, then why isn’t the same
\ntrue for books?<\/p>\n
The problem is something many of us lack in these soulless years: The
\nrare combination of patience and comprehension. When you pick up a
\nbook, you have to work to be part of the story. You have to pay
\nattention and think about it. Hell, most people can’t even do that for
\nmovies. “No, he said he was his brother five minutes ago, darling.”
\nThere are no visual effects to grab you. It’s you and the words, and
\nyou have to understand subtlety and that the story may take you a few
\ndays to get through in this format. It’ll be a 98 minute movie in the
\nfall, don’t worry.<\/p>\n
We’re lonely creatures in the modern world, yes? Sad souls struggling
\nto get home… How many of you turn on the TV as soon as you get back to
\nyour empty one bedroom apartments? Or a computer game, maybe?
\nSomething, anything that breaks up the goddamned silence. Why sit in
\nthat silence and read when you have Dish Network, a selection of new
\nvideo games and a loud stereo? Silence is the enemy, it makes you think
\nof what you may have achieved if you weren’t working eight days a week
\nto pay for your miserable, credit card life. So there, if you can’t sit
\ndown and comfortably read a book in silence, then you are truly amongst
\nthe unenlightened and you need to switch jobs.<\/p>\n
America is not a literate society. Even if you don’t agree with what
\nI’ve said above, you have to agree with that statement. One thing’s for
\nsure, we certainly fall behind the other uppity-up nations run by fat
\nwhite men. We don’t read, we don’t pay attention, we don’t comprehend
\nand we want everything packaged in a small container and simplified as
\nmuch as possible. Throw in a healthy dose of not giving a good goddamn
\nabout anything that happens outside of the Peoria City Limits, and you
\nget 280 million automatons. That’s what we do best. It’s not a 21st
\nCentury thing. It’s not a Gen X thing. We’ve always been automatons
\nand, before that, we were always farmers and, before that, we were
\nalways indentured servants and weird fur-trading frontiersmen. The
\nAmerican Revolution may have been run by shady Masonic landowners with
\nslaves and money to burn, but it happened because the ordinary Joes and
\nJanes were at the end of their wick. If we’re going to be ruled by
\nrich, white pederasts then, please, God, let it be the ones we have at
\nhome and not some absentee limey. That’s all it was. The forced removal
\nof an irritant so all the common people could get the fuck back to work.<\/p>\n
In the late 1800’s, the first powerful modern literary movements in the
\nUS were the sale of dime store true crime and Wild West chapbooks while
\nthe rest of the world was reading Wilde, Dickens and Chekhov; a
\nheavenly host of authors. But none could beat the true story of
\nBlackhand McGraw selling by the wagonload on the streets of Boston.
\nNothing’s changed, a century later.<\/p>\n
While the official American literacy rate is 97% (which, for the last
\ngreat empire on Earth, is shameful. Why not 100%, folks?), we must ask
\nthe question: How is literacy measured? Our government (thanks to the
\nNational Adult Literacy Survey) defines a “literate” adult as being
\nable to perform “Level 1” functions. Level 1 functions are defined by
\n“the ability to total a deposit slip, locate the time or place of a
\nmeeting on a form, identify a piece of specific information in a brief
\nnews article, or perform similar tasks.” How many of the 97% literate
\nAmericans are at Level 1 proficiency, according to the most recent
\nsurvey conducted by the US government (2002)? 23%.<\/p>\n
Level 2 is the next step up. What’s the definition of Level 2
\nproficiency? “Generally able to locate information in text, to make
\nlow-level inferences using printed materials, and to integrate easily
\nidentifiable pieces of information. Further, they demonstrate the
\nability to perform quantitative tasks that involve a single operation
\nwhere the numbers are either stated or can be easily found in text. For
\nexample, adults in this level are able to calculate the total cost of a
\npurchase or determine the difference in price between two items. They
\ncan also locate a particular intersection on a street map.” And how
\nmany of the 97% are at this level? 28%.<\/p>\n
So 51% of literate adult Americans are barely able to work their way through a newspaper article.<\/p>\n
It doesn’t surprise me that nobody reads, or that the very act of
\nlearning from, you know, books and stuff isn’t deeply ingrained in our
\npsyche. Hell, we’re lucky if the people raising us don’t burn us with
\ncigarettes, if they’re even around.<\/p>\n
I don’t care, really. I’m a middle class white male, so the
\nall-consuming prejudice of this nation is no worry, and if the mindless
\nbastards want to die on the farm, they’re more than welcome. What’s it
\nto me? There’s no use preaching against the masses. What bothers me is
\nthe writer who doesn’t read. You know the type, the casual writer. I
\nsee it all the time, and I can actually tell from the writing.<\/p>\n
There are a number of popular excuses, and I hear them from most of the
\nwriters I work with. These excuses include the famous “I can do better”
\nroutine, where the struggling writer with several dozen blank pages on
\ntheir desk is frustrated by other authors getting into print. Then
\nthere’s the sensitive drunken Friday writer – I just get oh so
\ndepressed when I see this person, who sucks, in print while nobody will
\nlook at my 500 page lesbian fantasy novel written in a made up
\nlanguage. Woe is me!<\/p>\n
How about the distraction excuse? I love that one. Can’t read, it
\ndistracts me from Da Grate Amerycain Novle that I be done righting!<\/p>\n
Oh, they go on and on, and I’ve begun a personal crusade to stick a
\nfork in the eye of every writer who doesn’t constantly read. (Actually,
\nI’m at the point where I want to stick a fork in the eye of every
\nwriter, generally speaking. I should become an agent.) Let’s look at it
\nin a purely business-like perspective (which is how we all should be
\ntreating the craft of writing): To read is to study the competition.
\nYou get companies hiring secret shoppers, you get corporate espionage,
\nyou get bitter rivalry that often ends in gunfire and Matrix-style kung
\nfu battles on the floor of Wall Street. So, if anything, just read for
\nthat purpose. Study trends, look at who’s on top and who’s laying eggs,
\nsee what all the hubbub is about. This is your business, stupid.<\/p>\n
Then there’s structure; the great enemy of the writer – how to get past
\nact 2, assuming you can even get that far without having a meltdown.
\nWhen I read a book, I’m constantly aware of how the book is put
\ntogether. There are no trade secrets in this business. There’s no
\nemployee’s manual, either. So, how’s it done? Why does it sell? Easy
\nenough, learn to see the Matrix, Neo. You can see the patterns in the
\nswirl of words if you train yourself. Better still, it’ll increase your
\nenjoyment of the story tenfold, not only because you’re thinking, but
\nbecause you’ll be able to appreciate the true craft of good writing
\nwhenever it’s in front of you.<\/p>\n
Finally, read for enjoyment. It’s the profession you want to get into,
\nright? You want the 15 literate Americans Level Three Proficient and
\nhigher to buy your book for 59 cents at a used bookstore, right? Right.
\nSo be<\/em>
\none of those readers. Everything you read expands your mind, even if
\nyou’re pointing out errors to yourself. In the writing business, it’s
\nall about the shape of your mind. Hazy, glazy grey matter burnt out on
\njobs, debt and the go-go-go of modern America will not produce
\nsomething marketable. In other words, you’re wasting everyone’s time.
\nStop right now and go finish your degree in automation and
\nsoullessness. But if you’re going to be a writer, then that’s your job,
\nand so is everything to do with it.<\/p>\nHere we go, if you read six books or fewer a year, and you aren’t a
\ndoctor, lawyer, crazed university student or making over 100K a year
\ndoing something productive, then you’re a member of the mindless
\nmachine. You’re a zombie. You’re a stupid monster. Here’s my challenge
\n— I want everyone who has managed to read this far to read at least 11
\nbooks a year. And fuck the book clubs of the world – go and browse you
\nuseless morons! If you want suggestions, tell me what you’re interested
\nin and I’ll do the research for you. Eleven books a year is easy, kids.
\nThat even gives you a month off for good behavior. Your goal should be
\n20 or more. Eventually, you’ll be reading five books at once and you’ll
\nreach enlightenment.<\/p>\n
I’ll let you slide if you read big books like Werth’s history of the
\nSoviet Union during the Second World War. That took me a long-ass time
\nto read, and I even skipped ahead to the sex scenes!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[352],"tags":[353,127],"class_list":["post-2585","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-gsarchive","tag-gs-archive-2004-2008","tag-writing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/greatsociety.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2585","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/greatsociety.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/greatsociety.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/greatsociety.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/greatsociety.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2585"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/greatsociety.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2585\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2888,"href":"https:\/\/greatsociety.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2585\/revisions\/2888"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/greatsociety.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2585"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/greatsociety.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2585"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/greatsociety.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2585"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}