Does it Play Doom?

[Tyson]

Now whenever one of your retarded friends (all two of 'em) ask you "but does it play Doom?" you'll have an answer:

http://www.itplaysdoom.com/

Doom never caught my fancy. It was Wolfenstein 3D that got me hot.

In no particular order, the best 3D Shooters Ever According to Tyson:

Wolfenstein 3D - Classic!
UT2004 - The pinacle of multiplayer deathmatch. The only thing to improve on this is graphics, which this already shines in.
Deus Ex - Best storyline. Ever!
Max Payne - Best storyline. Ever!
Quake 1 and 2 - Gameplay at it's best. Perfect balance of all the elements of shoot-'em-ups.
Halo - Duh.
Oni - The first and only successful combination of guns and fist fighting I've played. Great storyline too.

I'd add Half Life 2 but... *sigh* Shut up.

Any other favorites?

[nacho]

I liked the new Wolfenstein, and there's always Duke Nukem, of course.

[Tyson]

Oh, forgot Duke. The first funny FPS, for sure. Supposedly the new Duke is actually making progress. They spent three years writing their own engine and then the threw it all away and are starting on the Doom 3 engine. Word has it that they're actually making it. Finally!

The new Wolfenstien is a lot of fun, sure, but it just didn't break any new ground. Well, except for the flamethrower. Remember how big of a deal that was, back when it first came out?

And that Doom movie is going to suck. A lot. It has to be said.

Quake 4 though - I'm curious where that one is going to go. Appearantly it's just a continuation of the Quake 2 storyline with the Doom 3 engine.

[nacho]

I never got into Quake.  After Return to W, I jumped to all of those Paradox games.  Europa Universalis, Hearts of Iron, crusader Kings, Victoria... Just lamely play those over and over and over for years.

Now it's Rome Total War and I want to get a bit of an upgrade to play Silent Hunter III.
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=1612171

[Tyson]

Yeah. I'm starting to wish I had bought a desktop instead of a laptop so I could play the newer games. Oh well. When I make my millions.

The good thing is that it gives me an excuse to go back and play the classics I missed. Diablo, Starcraft, Warcraft 3 (not really a classic, I know), and all that.

Doom 3 might play well with low graphics options. I'll have to give it a shot.

But for a laptop, I'm really suprised how well my PowerBook plays games. I can play UT2004 with most graphics options on High at full resolution at about 20-30 fps. On the other hand, Microsoft borked the Halo code for Mac and it stutters in online play (not lag).

Then again, the UT2004 engine was designed to be cross-platform and to play well on many different machines.

http://www.unrealtechnology.com/html/technology/ue2.shtml

What's more exciting, though, is the 2x and 3 engines:

http://www.unrealtechnology.com/html/technology/ue2x.shtml
http://www.unrealtechnology.com/html/technology/ue30.shtml

3 puts the Doom 3 engine to shame.

Also, the new Duke isn't based on Doom 3's engine. Oops. It's based on an Unread engine. Hopefully 3.

What get's me the hottest is that the Unreal 3 engine supposedly plays just as well on hardware that the 2 engine plays well on. THAT'S unreal.

EDIT: Fixed bad link.

[nacho]

You know, I've never played Diablo.  I feel like I'm missing something.

[Tyson]

I played the demo years ago. I guess it's a cross between War/Starcraft and Dungeons and Dragons. Or something. Except you control one guy. Or something.

[yotoc]

You give SOJ!!???

I've played Diablo.  A lot.  Never did play II.  Pick it up.  It's fun.  And stuff.  Wait, maybe I did play II and not the original.  Never played online though.  Was II online only?  I don't fucking know!!!  Get off me.

[Tyson]

You give SOJ!!???

Wait, what?

[Tyson]

SOJ:

Super Oral Jobs?
Supreme Orange Juice?
Stupid Oral Jokes?

[yotoc]

Stone of Jordan.  Go read any online Diablo forum

[Matt]

Tyson don't know shit about Diablo or Diablo II.

I blew away one summer playing Diablo II, but the online community for it has mostly dried up and moved onto World of Warcraft. Same basic idea, same basic characters, different world.

[Tyson]

Tyson don't know shit about Diablo or Diablo II.

I said that, didn't I?

Also, I blew my lunch hour playing Warcraft 3. I think I'll pick up a discount version of it or something if I can. Hopefully it wont destroy my happy memories of blowing an entire summer playing the entire Warcraft Battle Chest straight through.

[nacho]

Necromancy!

This idiotic thread from 2005 seemed fitting for the new Doom teaser: