Taken for Granite > Intensive Porpoises
Tyson and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
Tyson:
So: Turned down for date, roommate took 5 hours in the shower and made me late so I didn't shave, I forgot my wallet at home and didn't realize until I tried to buy breakfast, had to bike back home and back to school to get now-cold breakfast, and showed up to work late. That's just this morning.
All that remains to happen is for me to get hit by a car today while I bike to class, which is a real possibility because they're doing highway construction and are shoving thirteen lanes of traffic on to my motherfucking shoulder.
Surely someone else is having a pissy day. Anyone?
Tyson:
Oh. I forgot my keys too.
That means I'll spend an hour breaking in to my own house while I'm late for class. The only roommate home during the day is a paranoid schitzo and can't take a shower or cook if the door isn't bolted shut. He then locks himself in his room and listens to metal at a volume only metal-heads seem to appreciate and masturbates furiously over his Bible Thus, ringing the doorbell is out of the question.
See, now that I'm venting on the forums, I've stopped beating strangers on the street.
Progress!
nacho:
I always have a pissy day.
Tyson:
Does that mean I'm above the national average?
nacho:
Here's the conversation I just finished with a customer:
Me: Well, I don't see a member record.
Them: Our organization is amember.
Me: Only individuals can be members.
Them: Yes, so we're members.
Me: No, individuals. Individual people.
Them: We're members.
Me: You're a school, not an individual.
Them: Well...we're members.
Me: Only individuals can be members.
Them: We're members.
Me: Are you a school?
Them: Yes.
Me: You are ordering for the school.
Them: Yes.
Me: There are no individual people involved, just the school.
Them: Yes.
Me: So you aren't members.
Them: Yes we are.
Me: No, I'm sorry. I can't give you the member price.
Them: We always get it.
Me: I have your record here. You have never gotten it.
Them: I don't know what to say.
Me: ...
Them: ...
Me: ...
Them: ...
Me: Well... There's nothing to say. I can't give you the member price.
Them: ...
Me: ...
Them: ...
Me: Hello?
Them: Yes.
Me: ...
Them: ...
Me: ...
Them: ...
Me: Um, so, do you want to place this order?
Them: We're members.
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