I once knew this guy, my grandfather’s friend. When I was a boy he came by to visit every once in a while and he and my grandfather would sit out on the side porch and drink iced tea, talking late into the night. My grandfather’s house was in upper Silver Spring, MD, on a […]
I watched Pump up the Volume the other day. Just for old time’s sake. In 2012, when the movie turned 25, it sort of re-entered the collective consciousness of geekdom with several retrospective articles. I haven’t bothered to sit down and watch the whole movie for maybe 10-15 years, though. Which I think is a […]
When did it become popular for everyone to send an email saying “gentle reminder” or “friendly reminder”? When did the American workplace become infected with this institutionalized passive-aggression? Because that’s the only way to read it, right? “Gentle Reminder” to a normal person means “What the fuck, Charlie? The whole team has fucking finished their […]
My weekend job… Jesus. For 21 years I worked as the house manager/event coordinator at an old mansion in the suburbs of DC. Weddings, memorials, bar mitzvahs, birthdays, everything. Every event was so similar in theme and approach, I just called it the “wedding job.” Even if it was a fucking christening, it felt like […]
Almost two years ago, I switched jobs at my idiotic company. I moved from the customer service arena to something (seemingly) far more rewarding that did not involve fucking customer service. It’s taken me this long to fully come to terms with this switch, and reach an emotional mindset that allowed me to fully parse […]
I’ve been invited to my girlfriend’s cousin’s roommate’s something or other wedding in Arizona in June. I know that probably doesn’t sound noteworthy but, for me, it’s a big deal. This stranger’s wedding will be the first time I’ll go to a wedding as, simply, a guest — a drunken sheep with no responsibilities. That’ll […]
At my day job, I have to suffer through the annual “Preventing Harassment” seminar — an online course that takes 120 minutes to complete, though all of the quizzes tell you what the right answers are so it’s kind of a click-fest. I don’t quite understand the purpose when they give you the answers… In […]
Back in May, I shared some nonsense about one of my old bosses. Time to do it again! We’ll call him Brian, and for this we’re going to the way way back, the before-times. 1994, and a tiny boutique bookshop in a ritzy suburb of DC.
Not a Youtube video! Shocking. I’ve long promised that I would start to “expose” all the insane workplace things I’ve encountered over the years. I’ve worked shit jobs since 1991, mainly customer service, and been constantly frustrated by all of the little quirks that appear to keep the world spinning.
I often go on about how bored I am. And I am. It’s overwhelming, sometimes. Every single aspect of my life is predictable. Like a show you’ve watched a million times. My entire life is Star Trek II on mute while I sprawl on the couch with a midday gin and tonic and mumble the […]