About a year ago, I discovered Slavery Footprint, which tracks the “virtual” slaves behind our posh lives here in the world’s last, great empire. Because I’m a Luddite who wears the same clothes for 20 years (or until they fall to pieces like some sort of lunatic castaway leaping around on the shore of an […]
Since I now only write articles so that I can keep the GS Kindle subscription active and, therefore, make my precious $3 a month from subscribers who mistakenly think this is a porn site for some reason, I should probably angle towards more light-hearted fare.
I’ve spent the past few years bemoaning the gentrification of Silver Spring. How the town has lost her charm, her spice. How our dive bars have died. How we’ve been colonized by hipsters, transplants, neo-yuppies, armchair liberals, and the saccharine, mindless masses of salary serfs and condo owners. How we must endure the herpes-like sores […]
Silver Spring’s historic dive bar, the Quarry House, is dead. What it used to be, that is. The old Quarry House. It’s taken me six years or so to come to grips with this.
This is how they say it happened. My father started methodically. Calmly. Then, in the midnight darkness of the candy room, where vast copper pots of caramel and chocolate lay covered waiting for the morning shift workers, something went wrong. He started to rush. We have a witness from the end of the night. […]
During the week, I work for a membership-based organization catering to healthcare professionals. (Words we use loosely.) It’s what I refer to as my “day job” whenever I’m asked the difficult question “what do you do?” and find myself describing my six very different jobs.
Today I want to condemn the highly corporate Silver Spring Farmers Market. Because we should be honest with ourselves. The Silver Spring Farmers Market sucks. So where do I go? I go to the Kensington farmers market, because they don’t know how to use an apostrophe.
I wanted to be open-minded. I wanted to embrace Fire Station 1, Silver Spring’s newest bar. I wanted to write a good bar review. So I hit them Friday night, two hours after they opened their doors for the first time. From a marketing perspective, good bar reviews at GS are poison. I write a […]
I think I’ve figured out what’s wrong with my town. I’ve watched it grow up from scary urban wasteland to gentrified post-suburban neo-yuppie masturbation sock, and there’s just a little something that’s off. A sort of sanitized soullessness that breeds boredom and frustration. And hookers can fix that. Wouldn’t it be nice to walk down […]
I do understand that condemning 8407 on their opening night is pretty cruel. Though I don’t think opening night jitters makes up for canned ham sandwiches and bartenders who don’t know how to tend bar, I do understand that one has to be somewhat forgiving. Silver Spring is a growing community, in the process of […]