Category: Wage Slave

Let them eat static

I often go on about how bored I am. And I am. It’s overwhelming, sometimes. Every single aspect of my life is predictable. Like a show you’ve watched a million times. My entire life is Star Trek II on mute while I sprawl on the couch with a midday gin and tonic and mumble the […]

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What are your weaknesses?

We have a high turnover at my day job because we work for fascists. It’s not really obvious, on the surface, that we work for fascists. It’s this sort of creeping, passive-aggressive thing. After a few years you find yourself in a watchtower at a concentration camp and your supervisor asks you to rape and […]

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Illegal Laundry

This is the lonely time. Crouched in the dark, spooky basement of the old mansion where I work on the weekends. My seasonal weekend job is grinding to a halt, so the mansion is quiet and dark this Friday night. The sounds of music and dancing and caterers shifting equipment doesn’t pound through the floor. […]

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One Percenter

I realized the other day that I haven’t really felt the economic downturn at all. In fact, I’ve been better off these last few years than the last 20. Yes, I work six jobs, but each one of them is secure. At my regular salary serf jobs, I’ve seen huge annual raises, absurd quarterly bonuses, […]

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The Haunting of Nacho Sasha

I just had my first free weekend in a year. It wasn’t planned. I was supposed to go to a Halloween party on the 29th, but then we had a freak blizzard. While, thankfully, there was no accumulation in DC, the psychological effect – especially after the last two years of horrific winter storms – […]

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The Dead Box

My weekend job is at an organization housed in a historic mansion on a large wooded lot in the middle of a wealthy suburb. The event rentals make about half a million a year, which covers half of the yearly cost to maintain the property. That other half a million comes from the results of […]

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Special Day

The business of weddings, as I’ve watched it evolve over the last 20 years, has become one of the more disgusting examples of runaway capitalism and usury.

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Sub Rosa

Let’s get one thing out of the way. Honest people need not apply for catering jobs. It’s not like waiting tables. It’s my impression that the machinery of the service industry enforces a sort of honesty system on waiters, who have to tip out to the bussers, bartenders, hostesses, and others. A vast network of […]

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Co-workers

I think it’s time to start telling my co-workers what I really think about them. I’ve coasted through my day job for ten years now, keeping my head down, trying to fade into the crowd and just muddle through the day.

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Catering

I’ve been doing an inventory of my life over this last year. Looking back on the sins, successes, excesses, and all those things we carry with us. I’ve concluded that the world is insane and I’m living in some sort of unending horror movie. At any moment, a man wearing a flash mask is going […]

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