Category: Rants

Welcome to the Resistance by Rotting Corpse

Until recently, I’ve normally keep my politics to myself. There are lots of reasons for this, but the main one is that even among friends, a political discussion is by far the easiest way to start an argument outside of “Who made a better Batman, Keaton or Bale?”

Share

The System

Oh, right, it’s Inauguration time. My fellow armchair liberals have all been dreading this day and, in dark rooms, as they caress their mother’s underwear, they’ve worked hard to convince themselves that this isn’t happening.

Share

Autobiography

Top ten things I wish I had included in the stupid memoir about my evil family and my fucked up life after I had them all killed:

Share

Grief Cycle

There’s been no escaping the post-election freakout. I’ve tried. But everyone’s talking about it…seemingly more than usual. The four stages of jilted liberal grief are just so predictable though.

Share

Stop telling me to get out and vote

First of all, I’m addicted to voting. I think it’s important, I always vote, and I revel in the idea that my little vote is part of a grander, greater voice of potential revolution. At the local level, I vote against judges and council people I don’t fucking know out of pure spite. I write […]

Share

Brain Fart #9 by Monkey!

Today I read an article on Psychology Today, ‘Does Talking To Attractive Women Make Men Dumber?’ and obvious sexist implications aside, the writing in general angered me. The claim is that men become temporarily less intelligent when talking to attractive women in person judged by cognitive performance tasks pre and post interactions with same-sex and opposite-sex partners. Why […]

Share

Brain Fart #8 by Monkey.

After months of guttersnipe press and stupid people who allow tabloid media to decide their vote, the U.K. is fucked. Before the referendum vote I was baffled some would even consider such foolhardy action regardless of ‘Project Fear’ in the classless and low quality tabloid press of England which – owned by friends of the […]

Share

Monday Brain Fart #7 by Monkey!

The common delusion of democracy is at once a great boon and sin for modern society. How can you say this? idiots may ask and may well they ask; your vote doesn’t count. Let’s examine the present U.S. Candidate race. A contestant may win 60% of the popular votes yet the unelected delegates may choose […]

Share

Monday Brain Fart #Whatever by Monkey!

One thing I would not have thought so hard to find in adulthood would be a great pair of jeans – not a good pair of jeans but a great pair of jeans. I found those jeans, once, but now I cannot find their replica. I loved them dearly and held them tightly and squeezed […]

Share

Bad Words

Every once in a while I have, in my real life interactions, what I like to call “a Nacho moment.” I’ll sort of slip into the Nacho persona and say or do something that horrifies the regular people. Actually, it probably happens more frequently than I realize, and I know that it’s happening only when […]

Share